I’m anticipating the strangeness of it, where one day I’m a husband, where one day I’m a father, and June rolls through and Father’s Day comes and I’m given a gift and a kiss and a day just for me simply for being a dad–
simply for being there.
It’s strange for me because I never grew up with a father. I’ve known fathers, good and bad fathers, friends’ fathers, random fathers, but never my father, and it’s a point that when you read this may seem as though it’s being brought up in bitterness, but it isn’t–promise; it’s just relevant.
This Father’s Day is unique for me, not because I’m celebrating it or because anything different will happen day of, but because of the circumstances going on in my life that are unique to right now and the Father’s Day to come. I’m engaged. In November I’ll be married and every Father’s Day from here on out will mean something to me and what will be my family because I’ll be in the position of caretaker, provider, leader and dad for the rest of the days to come.
It’s weird to me. It’s never a day I’ve celebrated. It’s never a day I’ve acknowledged. I’ve never felt longing for the day, as if I were missing something by not being a part of it–I’ve often times just forgotten its existence altogether, as if it were any old Sunday, which isn’t to say I wouldn’t have liked it to mean something but–well, you get the point.
I throughly respect the men though being celebrated this Sunday because being a dad is hard. Being a dad denotes devotion, it denotes attentiveness, mentorship, friendship, and leadership. It’s a title given to a person who devotes their life to their child and their family, above all else–that is a dad.
And that job is hard. A father on the other hand (and some people may disagree with my splitting hairs here but bear with me) is different–a father is biological. It isn’t a relationship, it isn’t time spent, it’s a title of ownership over a half of a person and little else than that.
A dad sticks around. A father doesn’t have to. All of the fathers that became dads deserve being celebrated Sunday for being there, for being good, for fighting the good fight and being something for their children rather than cutting and running for no particular reason. Sunday is for you–take it in and enjoy it because being a dad can be thankless. The road can be hard and you may feel as though you are failing, but it’s worth it in the end to just be there, as opposed to the alternative.